Aaron and Flynn : It's all so unfair : Part One
by Anna Rawlings
Summary: Aaron finds himself visitng Flynn and is full of guilt, frustration and confusion over it.  This is a correctly edited version of the original story


**Aaron and Flynn : It's all so unfair.. (Part 1)**

Aaron was already aroused when he arrived at Flynn's. The swelling in his pants had become a dull ache and needed some relief. Flynn was the only person Aaron could think of to help him with this.

Did he fancy Flynn? Not really. He didn't think so.

Did he really WANT Flynn, not really, he didn't think so.

So why did he come here? Because he knew that he could and that Flynn wouldn't turn him away. It was as simple as that really.

Did Flynn know this? He was sure that he must.

"Well hello" Flynn's eyes lit up at his unexpected visitor." This is a nice surprise. Why didn't you call?"

"Erm, because it was a spur of the moment thing" Aaron muttered, quickly grasping for a reason. It was true he hadn't planned this.

Flynn looked questioningly at his companion, sensing his heavy mood.

"I just thought I'd come and see you, I can leave if you want." Aarons tone was cold. He always struggled with niceties.

"No," Flynn scrambled. "Don't just stand there, come on in." He beckoned to the lounge and swung by the adjoining kitchen on the way to grab a couple of beers. "So, what's up?" He asked.

Aaron didn't answer, he just leaned over and kissed Flynn's startled face. He hadn't expected that. Aarons kiss was hard; devoid of affection. Flynn responded as tenderly as he was able.

Despite Aarons brashness, Flynn hadn't been able to stop himself falling for him. There was something about him that Flynn just couldn't resist. In a good mood Aaron was cheeky, fun and exciting. Although to be honest, those days were not frequent. Mostly he was moody, sullen & downright grumpy. But Flynn could feel something when he was with him. This unpredictable man made him feel alive & he loved being with him. So he tolerated the gruff times in the hope that the fun times would become more often.

Tonight Aaron wasn't in the mood for small talk. He was only there for one reason. Underneath Flynn knew this. He knew how much Aaron missed Jackson and how he was struggling to cope. One day he hoped that he himself would be able to capture Aaron's heart to some significant degree and in the meantime he was content to settle for whatever he was given.

Within minutes Aaron was ripping the young man's shirt open, exposing his downy chest and began to kiss it. He pulled on the semi erect nipples and pushed his boney fingers into his flesh. Flynn let out a gasp and tried to find a way to calm his friend's urgency. He tried to ease him backwards onto the bed, loosened his shirt and gently ran his hands across Aarons chest and midriff. At the same time reaching up for a kiss. But Aaron was incensed with an anger that would not subside. He turned away from the offered kiss and moved straight onto the unsuspecting man's neck. He sucked and bit until he drew blood. He could feel Flynn flinch as he continued to move across his throat.

Aaron was consumed and reached down to unbuckle his jeans. He opened his zipper to release his hardness, exhaling as he did so. He needed relief and Flynn he knew could and would do this for him.

He pulled the willing man's hand down to encourage him to start the process.

Whilst Flynn set to work, Aaron reached to remove Flynn's trousers and began to manhandle his joystick, with very little care, tenderness or feeling. He very quickly lost interest with that and urged his partner to turn around. Flynn knew what was coming and began to prepare himself.

He quickly reached over and grabbed the lube from the bedside cupboard, forcing it into Aaron's impatient hand.

"Aaron..?" he sought confirmation that he would use it as he looked searchingly into Aaron's darkened eyes. Aaron allowed his gaze to be met for just a brief second, conceded, snatched the tube & began to apply it liberally around the relevant areas.

Aaron wasted no more time and began to insert himself where he knew he would find his much needed release. He hurriedly entered himself, pausing for only a split second to check that he was positioned okay for his braced lover. Without any real confirmation of this, he impatiently set about his mission to rid himself of all his pent up lust, frustration and angst. He could hear Flynn exhale, emitting frequent, barely-audible moans.

Aaron 's instincts were to hold this wonderful man, hug him, kiss him and thank him for being there for him. But he could do none of these. He was mad with him. He was angry because he wasn't Jackson. That is who he really wanted to love, hug & bestow his affection upon. It was all so damn unfair.

And for none more so than for Flynn, as once again he became the escape for all the repressed emotions swirling around in Aaron's head.

He steadied his smaller body for the onslaught of Aarons ardour. He didn't expect any tenderness or consideration and he didn't receive any.

By now Aaron was in a world of his own, thrusting into his compliant partner, not caring whether he was feeling any pleasure from it. He enjoyed hearing Flynn groan and pumped harder and deeper, flexing his back further, reaching his full length to its maximum and slammed away, biting at Flynn's already bruised neck and gripping his hips as their bodies crashed.

Aaron was panting heavily; he was oblivious to any needs of his partner. He actually didn't care at all how he was feeling right at that moment. He was ready to release his load at any time, which Flynn sensed. He tried to turn to Aaron, not for a kiss (he knew better than that) but to maybe slow down the pace and offer some tenderness into the experience. Maybe if he could encourage Aaron to take a big breath and just pull back for a few moments, Flynn could then try and find a way to help him relax and derive so much more from this interlude. He wanted to at least try, for both of them.

"Aaron," Flynn breathed and reached up to gently touch his cheek. "It's okay, we have all night." But his words pricked at Aaron. 'How can he want to be nice to me?' he thought, 'when I treat him this way.'

He was unable to allow those feelings out, or even to acknowledge them. He forced his friend back around and with one hand firmly against the back of his neck and one at the base of his spine, he banged himself against his friends sweating body, lapping up the glow as his balls became taught and he exploded himself deep inside his uncomplaining partner.

He held himself there for a few moments, his forehead resting between Flynn's shoulder blades, until he felt himself become limp. He gently eased himself out and that is when the familiar, horrid, pit-of-the- stomach guilt started to kick in. He felt sick with disgust.

He looked down at his exhausted friend. Aaron knew in his heart that he didn't deserve to be treated this way. He was actually a really nice guy and Aaron liked him a lot. He was tolerant, ever patient, understanding and above anything he truly cared about Aaron. So why did Aaron keep using him this way.

He slumped back on the pillow and tried to analyse his behaviour. Probably frustration, supressed lust, anger, confusion..? Who knows, probably all of them and more. He was not good with understanding emotions or feelings and it was all quite beyond him. Despite this he was still unable to lean over and kiss his friend. He was embarrassed, ashamed and disliking himself too much for any of that.

He also felt that he had betrayed his real love, the friend he had hidden his true feelings from for so long. Even though it was Jackson that had urged him to do this in the first place, he hated himself for agreeing to it and for doing it and dragging the undeserving Flynn into his complicated life.

He felt like he was cheating on Jackson, Jackson didn't deserve this either. Why did it all have to be such a big mess!

As the tormented man struggled with his emotions, Flynn, ever sensitive and ever hopeful, leaned forward and lightly placed his lips on Aarons; a flicker of pleasure rippled through Aaron as he did so. It felt so nice after all the rage had now been expelled from him.

He leaned in to reciprocate, even accepting the tip of Flynn's tongue and returning his own. This was so very gentle that Flynn hardly dared to breath, he reached his hand ever so lightly to the back of his calmed lover's neck and pulled him tenderly towards him. To Flynn's surprise, their kiss became passionate and they began to run their hands over each other; their sweat, now sticky was sensual to their touch.

Flynn had caught Aaron with his guard down, unexpectedly and just momentarily. He basked in the delight of this as it proved to him that there really was something there underneath it all. It gave him hope that one day he might be able to savour more of it. He finally managed to hold Aarons eye contact.

"I'm sorry," Aaron struggled. "What for?" Flynn returned, genuinely curious as to what his lover was sorry for.

"I don't mean to hurt you.." he replied, as he glanced fleetingly at the younger man's bruised neck and grazes across his back, the nip marks along his shoulder. "..or your heart…" He was not good with words or expressing what he meant. But Flynn fully understood what was going on in Aaron's head. He understood how hard it must be for him.

He truly hoped he would be able to help him through it somehow, but at the same time, yes it did hurt to be used as he was.

Why did he put up with it? He was so fond of this troubled young man and hoped beyond anything that one day his affections would be returned.

Now that Aaron had calmed, Flynn thought that maybe they could spend some relaxing time together, properly enjoying each other. The sudden unexpected gentleness Aaron had just displayed ignited hopes for this. "Will you stay the night?" Flynn asked tentatively.

This brought Aaron to a start. "Er, no" he rushed, "I cant. I have to leave."

No reason was offered but Flynn already knew it was because this man he cared so much about wanted to be with another guy. As much as much he hated it, he knew he couldn't change it, so he pasted on a brave face, hid his heavy heart and watched sadly as his lover for the night hastily dressed and left with barely a wave.

Aaron turned a wistful smile before exiting the door. He had to go and see his real love now. Not to give him any details about tonight, but just to be with him, feel his presence, listen to his sarcasm and simply enjoy the chemistry they shared. That connection they had between them that Aaron was finding so impossible to break.

He wished he didn't keep going to see Flynn. If only things were different, but of course they weren't and therefore there was nothing else for Aaron to do but to try and find a way through it all.

He arrived at Jackson's door. He knew what time it was and he knew he would have to bear the full wrath of Hazel, but it was worth it just to spend some time with the only man he truly wanted to be with.


End file.
